Sunday, February 8, 2009

A Funny Place

Not funny-ha, ha.... no, more like funny-oh, no.

I don't know why I thought I could pound out a chapter a day in the rewrite. I guess Nano was a rough introduction to the process... not at all how my brain works when the word count is essentially meaningless.

No number of words can make me feel resolved if the scene is still hanging out their, fractured and waiting for the right fix.

So I'm at a funny place. From here, I can see most of the story unfold, with its plot frailties fixed, or at least improved upon from that sad little draft 1.... But I can also see that it will take more time than I thought.

My writing life is so easily over run with teething troubles and trips to the doctor and no sleep or a hopeful attempt at the occasional social venture out of my house. I really don't have enough time to ensure completion before April 1, when this fool turns 30....

Although that deadline isn't all that meaningful anymore. I've made the steps I intended to make, writing daily, and striving to learn how to really tell a story.

Yet it's so tempting to quit. Not writing altogether, but this story. Too much to fix... not as exciting as it once was. No one will read it anyway. Who cares....

But no, NO, no.... I'll keep going. The newly beefed up characters keep whispering things to me... like how to begin their next chapter, and how much they secretly like one particular character I want them to loathe. That fact, in and of itself, is curious enough to keep me going.

So off I go, to chapter two... Still forging ahead, with whatever little time I can squeak out.

1 comment:

Anna said...

keep going!!!

really. it's a process, believe me. and it takes time. and I know time is sort of parceled out in your world right now, but once you get into it, it won't seem so old, passe, difficult.

really. keep moving towards that goal. it will happen!!!

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