Photo Friday

"There's a spider." Which proves that all of my bug books, bug hunting, and general tough guy attitude around bugs were completely futile.

Thiiiis Close

I'm so close to having a reasonable outline for PA. The Pollocking exercise (on Pollock's birthday no less) was incredibly helpful, and somehow I managed to rearrange the existing bits of my novel into a plot that has a lot more momentum.

Now I just need to fill in the last few holes... and organize all of that information into an outline that isn't on easel paper that takes up half a wall (pictures forthcoming).

I'm Thiiiis Close (imagine pointer finger and thumb nearly touching), to rewrite #1 on a story that will still resemble draft #1 (a victory in its own right)...

But my weekend is so busy, I can't imagine when I'll get to it. I will... somehow. If I have to open a time machine and go back to my super productive and inspired Tuesday night, so be it.... I've taken a few physics classes....

Time machine it is.

Outline by Monday or Bust!

ZZzzzzz

Oh dear. Here's another good public radio program if you're interested. Midmorning's Why We Sleep.

We all know that sleep boosts our immune system. Now, new research is demonstrating the link between sleep and all sorts of other metabolic processes. A good 8 hours of sleep per night can prevent weight gain and promote weight loss. An average of less than 7 hours of sleep per night can lead to a substantially greater risk of heart attack, among other alarming side effects.

The program is mostly geared at over achievers who are artificially limiting their sleep so they can get more done. That is definitely not my issue. I'm now going on my third year of involuntarily interrupted, rarely dependable, usually 6 hours per night sleep habits. I miss my 8 or 9 hour sleep habits... I miss long, involved, crazy dreams.... and now, I face the grim prospect of long term associated health problems.

Good grief.

Those of you who can... luxuriate in your zzzz's!

Pet Store Bribery

The girls and I were so happy so see the mercury move above 10 degrees today!


We headed out to do a little shopping... necessities only of course... we're in a recession. My favorite parenting trick, when restless little ones are sick of sitting in the target shopping cart, is bribery. Of course, I'm health conscious enough not to offer up chocolate.... at least not right away.

My favorite bribe is a trip to the pet store. Petco is always located next to Target. I'm really not sure why that is, but it's incredibly convenient. After purchasing our bananas, 5T stretch pants, and night lights (what an odd combo for one store), the girls can run around, greeting rabbits, hamsters, turtles, birds, and cats. They find it fascinating.

And the promise of a pet store trip keeps them excited through all the boring stuff.



Of course today, I broke my own rule and let them head to the pet store first.... bad idea. It then took two cookies and a box of goldfish to get through Target. Perhaps the experts are right... bribery isn't the best plan.

But it works! :)

Ready, Set... Battle!

Marathon battles with a preschooler almost kept us from making it to class.

It was Elliot's first day of ECFE, a simple learn-how-to-be-away-from-mama sort of class, so all three of us needed to be dressed for public interaction (instead of jammies under our coats.... I confess, Elliot and I don't always get put together before dropping Maya off).

I started early... an hour early! Elliot and I were dressed and ready.

Unfortunately, Maya fell apart over nearly every decision.

Which princess unders to wear? She wanted the pair still in the laundry....

Which ponytail holder to wear? It took me 20 minutes to figure out that she wanted me to braid it.... after first trying everything right down to putting Christmas ribbons in there....

Which pair of mittens to put on? Of course she found one with no mate....

It was exhausting! I almost called the whole thing off..... I almost threw my own tantrum....

Thankfully, I didn't. Elliot loved her class, keeping up with a room full of two year olds without any trouble. Maya learned the letter "O", and I got to spend an hour with other adults, drinking coffee, and talking about how hopeful we all are about the new administration.

And the girls were so worn out that they practically put themselves down for a nap. Contrary to my instincts, a rough start doesn't always mean we should crawl back into bed.

Instant Meme Ten

Pulled off of PBW... A good time waster for a girl who can't wrap her head around her plot structure.

Ten Things from the Imagination Prompt Generator
(along with my answers)

What keeps you going?

Coffee.... too easy? My spa bathtub and a glass of wine... I confess... I'm a little generic... but it's the truth

Describe each member of your family.

Oh dear... How about this... Witty & Easygoing... Witty & Easygoing Jr... Witty & Intense & Highstrung ... and Playful & Highstrung

Did it snow much when you were a child?

I was snowed in once for over a month... the snow was up to our roof in parts, and we made a sled run off of the house!

Write a letter to someone you appreciate.

Dear Public Radio, Thank you for being my rock, my connection to the world of meaningful adult conversation. Without you, my conversations would all start with "You wouldn't believe what my daughter did..." and end with some horribly inappropriate story about bodily fluids. Thanks for saving me and those I love from that fate. ~ Sarah

Do you believe that today can be the ‘first day of the rest of your life?’

Well, monumental lifestyle changes aren't really in the cards at the moment... but I do believe I'll probably start eating healthier, watching less TV, and practicing daily meditations.... next Monday.... or the Monday after that.

I remember . . .

Sunshine... warm grass on barefeet.... digging in the dirt... BLAH! I'm sick of winter!

Look at your hands. Why are you grateful for them?

Um, because they are excellent chip and dip dispensers?

If I could trade in my adulthood for a second childhood, I'd...

Run off barefoot into the trees behind my house and not come home until supper.... And I wouldn't rush a moment with that whole "I wish I could be 11... 11 is sooo mature" crap that I obsessed over when I was 8.

Name five things laying around your computer.

Baby monitor, yoga fitness ball, two child-sized cowboy hats, one kaleidoscope, and a dryer sheet... this place is a mess!

How would you rate your self image?

If headed to some sort of reunion? Not so good. Otherwise? Outstanding!

If you'd like some different prompts, visit the Creativity Portal's Imagination Prompt Generator.

Queen of the Mess

Just ask Joe. When it comes to making a mess, I'm the Queen, the Champion, the Top Dog... Even when my competitors are still developing their fine motor skills and large muscle groups.

The reason is simple. I'm the mastermind for messy activities. On days like this, when winter is this endlessly fierce cold pressing in on us, preventing our escape, why not make a mess? The activity plus the clean up will consume a good chuck of time that, on bright summer days, would be spent in the garden or the sandbox.... oh how I miss them. And the mess.

This was one of my messier activities. We lugged the plastic kitchen into the real kitchen, laid down some towels, and brought in some water. The result was a soggy, splashy mess. And a good hour of occupied kid time that freed me up to clean a few things that needed to be taken care of. So in spite of the still-damp kitchen, it was a constructive mess.

Gotta love that!

How I Jackson Pollocked my Novel

I solved my problem of exploding notes.

I had a little inspiration after a flippant comment to my hubby that the disarray of my notes was the literary version of a Jackson Pollock creation (not the whole priceless art part, just the mess part) .

So I unrolled my daughter's easel paper along one wall, grabbed the first stack of notes (the one that was most organized), and started throwing ideas on the paper. It was the most writing fun I've had since week 3 of NaNoWriMo!

Thankfully, the result wasn't completely chaotic. I was striving for a visual layout of the outline, putting each already written scene up on the paper, along with point of view character and major conflict. I left space between each scene for additions or other notes, which I filled in as I found the bits and pieces recorded in my other notebooks.

And I left space at one end for a revised character list, to keep track of the changes I had mentally made to the cast.

Words were flying, and new ideas were gelling around the holes in my original draft... it was beautiful. The most helpful part of the exercise, is that it gave me a sense of proportion. I could actually see that too many scenes were devoted to some relatively minor parts of the plot, and other major points were simply hidden within other scenes. Seeing it all on this roll of craft paper made the edits seem a little more clear.

And it was loads of fun! Luckily, I have more crazy notes to sort through tonight, so I get to do it again!

On the Flip SIde

After days of no sleep, one good, full night of sleep can feel like a drug. I've got energy pouring out of me today!

Thanks to all of that energy, I had a breakthrough on my outline, when a character that very nearly got edited right out of the story suddenly decided to go crazy and start sabotaging the rest of the cast. I still have some pretty big plot tangles to sort out, but I have a good start and a pretty clear idea of how it's going to go.

New goal: finish the outline this weekend, and do some fresh character prep work this week. This way I can start a chapter by chapter rewrite by next Sunday.

Oh lovely, lovely sleep. How I've missed you!

Food to Fend off Frostbite!

Last Saturday, I posted that great apple/honey baked chicken recipe. This Saturday, I'm ordering you to bake the chicken.... and turn the leftovers in to chicken soup.

Just use the juices from baking the chicken, plus the chicken meat cut off the bone, and all the apples and onions. Add some more sauteed onion, carrots, and celery. Add extra chicken broth to fill out the soup to 4 or 5 cups worth of liquid. And Egg noodles. That's it. It's delicious. A little savory. A little sweet. And absolutely delicious.

But that's not all. I had one other gem this week. Chicken pot pie. I started with a Paula Dean recipe... and I IMPROVED it. Oh yes. It was grand! I added bacon to a Paula Dean recipe!!!

Lady and Sons Chicken Pot Pie - as modified by yours truly

• 4 sheets frozen puff pastry
• 1 egg, beaten
• 4 chicken breast halves, or 2 cups leftover cooked chicken (I just used one large chicken breast cut up)
  
• Seasoned salt and pepper
• 2 tablespoons cooking oil
• 1/3 cup butter
• 2/3 cup all-purpose flour
• 1 quart heavy cream (I just used the whole milk we keep on hand for Elliot and it was still indulgent!)
  
• 1/4 cup chicken base
• 1 tablespoon minced garlic
• 1/2 small yellow onion, minced
• 1 cup frozen green peas, cooked (I sauteed carrots, onion, zuccini, and green beans for the filling... it's what I had on hand, and it turned out great).
  
• 1 cup chopped cooked carrots
• Pinch fresh grated nutmeg, optional

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

2. Cut each sheet of frozen puff pastry into 1-inch strips, 8 inches long. On a large cookie sheet, weave strips into a lattice large enough to cover each pot pie. Brush beaten egg onto each lattice square. Bake for 5 minutes, or until dough has risen and turned light golden brown. Set aside until ready to assemble pies. Leave oven on at 350 degrees F. (the weaved lattice makes eating the pies easier, but Maya and I had a lot of fun varying the styles of our pie toppers... hers, of course, had an M on it)

3. Season chicken with seasoned salt and pepper. Heat oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Add chicken and saute until cooked through. Remove from heat and cut into chunks. Alternatively, you may use precooked chicken. (I added to strips of thick cut bacon... it made a huge difference in the flavor of the chicken and the flavor of the filing in general )

4. In a large saucepan, melt butter and then slowly add flour, stirring until consistency of peanut butter, but not brown like a roux. Slowly add cream and keep stirring. Add chicken base, garlic, and onion and stir until thickened. Add peas, carrots, nutmeg, if using, and cut up chicken. Remove from heat. Fill 4 individual oven-proof bowls with chicken mixture and then top each with a pre-cooked lattice square. Bake for 5 minutes or until bubbly. Any remaining pie filling may be frozen.

Perfect for a cold day in the dark heart of winter!

Sleep...

A recurrent theme, for me.... sleep. I'm not one of those creative types you hear about, who write in the midnight hours and run on 4 to 6 hours of sleep...

well, lately I'm running on 4 to 6 hours of sleep...

My 15 month old is teething... badly. Her gums are painful to look at, so I can hardly blame her.

But my sleep deprived mind isn't untying the knot of my novel notes as well as it should be. I have two of the three groups of people in my novel all figured out, as far as rewrite changes go. I'm struggling with the antagonist, with where he fits and how much of his story needs to be in the big story...

Maybe all will make itself clear after a nap...

Here's to hoping... and sleeping!

Photo Friday

Penance for a loquacious week.... Brevity.

Note the backward pants :)

Elliot traded in the board books for a hardheaded baby doll... still smacks herself in the head when she rolls over though :)

Pragmatism... Blah

I have always taken a little pride in what I consider to be my unique combination of dreamy optimism, clear-eyed pragmatism, and whimsy.

My inner pragmatist convinced me to get an economics degree in college, though my inner optimist added a masters' degree in public policy in the hopes that I would choose public servant over banker.... Of course, the whimsy in me ditched the whole thing for motherhood (thankfully, before the economy demanded it).... at least for now.....

Except that once again my inner optimist has added her own spin to my most recent life choice, demanding that I pursue writing now, while I'm home with my kids.... perhaps Whimsy and Optimism have teamed up to lead me down the creative path that I should have started earlier....

Anyway, my poor inner pragmatist rears her head all too frequently. Especially during this editing phase. "Why bother?" she scoffs. "What a waste.... a new episode of Lost is on!" she teases.

And sometimes I give in.

On public radio this morning I listened to a bit of an interview with Leonard Bertein's daughter, who was reflecting on his creations. She said he frequently had to fight back his own inner pragmatist, knowing that being overly rational or pragmatic would force him to put his pen down.

Sometimes, knowing others have fought and won the battle before me makes it easier to fight that Pragmatist... though I'm still not sure what to do with her evil step-sister Sloth...

Off I go then.... :)

Flourishing

This morning I heard the most lovely thought: The Greek word for "happiness" can more accurately be translated to "flourishing." And it's true. Happiness isn't the bright smiling faces that first come to mind. No, happiness is a life of flourishing. Struggle and sacrifice and moments of sorrow don't detract from a life spent building relationships with people you love, doing work you love, and resisting the seductions of the material world.

I'm paraphrasing of course, from Minnesota Public Radio's Midmorning broadcast. Kerrie Miller interviewed Laura Rowley, a financial journalist turned divinity student and religious instructor. She's also the author of Money & Happiness. Listen to the program if you have a chance!

The interview is fantastic, both engaging and inspiring.

As we all tremble in the shadow of the current economic terror, I've been wondering how prudent it really is for me to remain unemployed. Ameriprise is laying off people left and right, and I have plenty of marketable skills.

Rowley's advice, that we live according to our values and relationships rather than the material goods that simply drive up our debt, was a good reminder.... Besides, it's not like there are jobs available at the moment... sheesh!

I'm rambling now.... Listen to the program if you can. I'll try to snag some pictures of my flourishing girls to jazz up this post!

On Humility

In spite of my high hopes and my passion for writing, it's not hard to maintain a little humility.... My notes and manuscript are so very full of hilarious typos (or freudian slips) that I have no trouble keeping things in perspective. (next time I run across one I'll post it, just for fun).

I'm quagmired in an effort to pile all of my notes into one document, so I can spend my weekend reevaluating the bigger picture and pounding out an outline.

It's just soooo tempting to keep thinking about and working on one of the two other novel ideas vying for attention.

But no, I will forge ahead. Humbly, and with periodic bursts of laughter at what a former self thought passed for "writing."

Hope is a Thing with Feathers

Happy Inauguration Day! My favorite hope quote of late (my blog title) is from Emily Dickenson and is printed on the back of our new book Louise: The Adventures of a Chicken. Every time I read it, I think of Obama and the fragile place we are all in, so full of hope and with so many obstacles to overcome.

Today I'm trying my hand at live blogging. I'll be adding updates throughout the day :)

8:50 AM: The country is abuzz with energy. Even here, from my little home base, I can feel the energy radiating from the hopes of the nation... the enthusiasm of the 2 million + people gathered in D.C. (which include my own lucky siblings!! How I wish I had accepted that invitation!) and the other hundreds of millions of us connected through a thousand different media outlets.

My favorite quote today is from author Rita Mae Brown: "Trust your instincts and don't hope more than you work." That last part, I think, applies beautifully. From everything we saw of his campaign style and his diligent cabinet assembly, I think we can have every confidence that President Obama will work at least as much as the hopes he has raised. More importantly, he is committed to transforming this energy and enthusiasm bubbling around us from hope into action in our own communities. I intend to get involved somehow....

What a fantastic moment to savor!

10:40 AM: At our house, Hope is a Thing with Construction Paper and Elmers Glue.... To keep the girls busy while I listen to NPR's inauguration coverage, we made celebratory hats. I can safely say, it's the first patriotic activity (non campaign related) I've done since shortly after 9/11.... which is the last time I felt this connected... unified with those around me.

The pictures coming out of D.C. are astounding. I can't believe how many people are there!






1:16 PM: Maya fully enjoyed the inauguration. Can you believe it? She's only 3 and a half! Every time the cameras swept over the massive crowd, she would pout out that lower lip and say, "Mama, next time, I want to go too!" She applauded for Hilary, who she recognized on sight, and for Obama's daughters, saying "I'm so glad he has little girls too!" She was fascinated by the past presidents, and kept asking me to elaborate on my inappropriate editorial notes about Cheney and W.... I still need to learn how to self edit! For naptime, we read the Obama book.... and now all is quiet for reflection.

Chickensicles!

No, no... just kidding. Everyone has been asking after our ladies, so I thought I would post an update.

It's been cold here, of late. Very, very, VERY cold. Last week was the sort of cold (at least 2 digits below zero most of the time) that imprisons the parents of very young children, as the youngest of us don't do well even on their brief transit to and from vehicles.

Thankfully, the subzero weather was predictable, and our coop was prepared. Joe had insulated much of the building and installed a coop heater in early October. We've tried not to run it too often, but it has definitely kept the chickens healthy through our Minnesota winter.

One morning, in December, I think, there were ice crystals on the inside of the coop. That was our cue to plug in the heater. Now we know that if it's below about 10 degrees, the chicken coop heater must be activated.

Eggsicles remain a problem, though. The nesting boxes are less insulated than the rest of the coop, and on the ultra cold days, the eggs don't all make it.

Also, two of our chickens (I'm not naming any names, but I have a guess), refuse to lay when the weather is that cold. All last week we gathered 2 or 3 eggs a day. When the weather resumed a human temperature range yesterday (woohoo for 18 degrees above!), we were once again gifted 5 eggs from our 5 grateful ladies.

I wonder if our cooped up ladies are already fantasizing about spring as much as I am?

Getting it Together... Or not

As it turns out, I'm having trouble getting back into the writing groove!

It's not really the writing that is a challenge, though. I just fell in love with a new story, and I've had no problem brainstorming and writing little starter scenes for that. I'm still doing daily free writes to keep the juices flowing.

It's that darn nano manuscript that's stumping me.

I've reread the stupid thing, and remarkably, I didn't think it was ALL that stupid. Not good, but salvageable. I took notes throughout that first reading. Big, broad, thought process notes. By the end, I had a pretty clear idea of how the overall structure needed to change to make it better. I've eliminated some characters, re-envisioned others, and added a more convincing antagonist.

But right now, the notes are all over the manuscript, a legal pad, and a little pocket notebook I've been carrying around. I know I don't have all those notes in my head, so at some point I have to put them together in a word document and draft a new outline for the rewrite.

That sounds way too like grad school.

The only thing that will save the poor thing is that my hubby is starting to study for his big actuarial exam in May. If he's studying, I'm more in the mood to do this sort of grunt work too. And just as soon as I have that outline, I'll be back to writing scenes.... hopefully better scenes.

We'll see! Next time I'll need to figure out a more organized process for this note taking business...

For our Hearts and Yours

Sharing good food is an act of love. During some particularly busy weeks, it is the only expression of love busy families have time to share.

This was one of those weeks at our house, and with my two little playmates occupying each other, I had plenty of time to prepare several lovely meals.

Here are two recipes that really stood out.

Cooking Light's Cranberry Muesli with Flaxseed
I realize this sounds intolerably healthy, but it is really incredible. The girls didn't have the nuts, and Maya picked out the cranberries (which essentially left them with yogurt and oatmeal smothered in syrup), but they loved it.

Ingredients

* 2 cups regular oats
* 1/2 cup dried cranberries
* 1/3 cup wheat germ
* 1/3 cup ground flaxseed
* 1/4 cup maple syrup
* 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
* 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
* 3 cups 1% low-fat milk
* 3 tablespoons slivered almonds, toasted
* 3 tablespoons chopped pecans, toasted
* 3 tablespoons pumpkinseed kernels, toasted
* 3 cups plain fat-free yogurt
* 2 tablespoons maple syrup

Preparation

1. Combine first 7 ingredients in a large bowl; pour milk over mixture, stirring to combine. Cover and chill 3 hours or overnight.

2. Combine nuts and pumpkinseed kernels in a small bowl. Spoon 3/4 cup oat mixture into each of 6 bowls. Top each serving with 1/2 cup yogurt; sprinkle each serving with 1 1/2 tablespoons nut mixture, and drizzle with 1 teaspoon maple syrup.

Baked Chicken with Honey & Apples from Fresh Choices
I highly recommend this cookbook for anyone struggling to figure out which part of the grocery budget must be organic, when buying 100% is too spendy.For a really great wintery dinner option, especially for kids, try this lovely main course. I used a whole chicken and increased the rest of the ingredients by a little. It was very easy,and I'm hoping to use the left overs in a unique chicken soup. We'll see how that runs out.

Ingredients

* 6 pasture-raised or organic bone-in chicken breast halves, skin removed
* 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
* 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
* 1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil
* 1/2 sweet onion, sliced
* 2 organic Granny Smith apples, peeled, cored, and chopped
* 1 tablespoon margarine or extra-virgin olive oil
* 1 1/2 cups organic apple juice
* 2 tablespoons honey
* 1 tsp salt

Preparation

1. Preheat oven to 350. Put the chicken in a shallow baking dish and sprinkle with cinnamon and pepper.

2. Heat the oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Add the onion and cook for about 4 minutes. Add the apples and cook for about a minutes. Pour over the chicken.

3. Melt the margarine in the skillet. Stir in apple juice, honey and salt. Cook for 2 minutes, deglazing the pan. Pour over the apples and chicken.

4. Bake, spooning the liquid over the chicken occasionally until the chicken registers 170 degrees or for about 45 minutes.

Bombs Away!

No, this isn't a post about the upcoming inauguration and my hopes for a more peaceful future (though that has been occupying my thoughts!) No, this is a bit of a rant about one of our latest purchases.

I'm assuming all of you have heard the latest household toxin to avoid: BPA or Bisipherol A. It's an estrogen like toxin in many plastics (and other household items) that tends to leach into our food and bodies in tiny amounts. Cumulatively, these tiny amounts can be incredibly harmful to growing neurological systems.

When the information on this latest little terror started mounting, our family ditched as much of it as we could. We tossed our brightly colored plastic drinking glasses in the recycle bin, trading them out for the classic 1950s aluminum cups that have made most of our guests sigh with nostalgia for grandma's house. We replaced many of our sippy cups with BPA free NUBY cups.

And for Christmas this year, Santa wisely brought Elliot a fancy, stainless steel Kleen Kantene sippy cup. The thing isn't cheep. It was $20, including two tops, compared to $4 for a NUBY. But it is oh so chic in the high fashion world of stay at home, suburban, hype-aware parents.


I did like it at first. It doesn't leak unless shaken really hard or tilted just right after a big drink (sadly, that's better than most of the other cups we've tried). It has a sort of funky look. At first the only drawback was that it's a bit heavier than her other cups, but she managed it just fine.

Maybe a little too well, in fact.

She now wields it like a weapon! She has actually dented the stainless steel along the bottom in several places, simply by hurling to the ground with all of her considerable might. I don't want to think about what it would do if it connected with my toe... or the window.

Occasional buyer's remorse is one of the drawbacks to my (and Joe's) uber decisive personality. It doesn't happen often, but this is one instance that I can't deny. Next time I'll consult this lovely review of BPA free sippy cups and bottles, which has a surprisingly wide array to choose from, and then consider the weapons grade potential of the actual item before I purchase it!

Yet it's fashionable, still works, and was spendy. So for the next year or so that Elliot will require sippy cups.... Bombs Away... hopefully away from anything breakable.

On to the Next Chapter

I am most aware of the changes in my girls just after a disruption in our schedules. I imagine other parents experience the same surge of observation, or maybe realization that the kids are getting big, when they are away for a bit. Christmas break combined with my vacation offered up tons of fresh perspective.

I discovered that Maya really speaks like a little grown up, which makes me awfully proud, and that Elliot's bedtime habit of cuddling with board books until she hits herself in the head has actually gotten worse.

More exciting is my realization that Elliot has officially passed the "baby on hip" chapter! Now we're on to the "run around giggling" chapter. It's part Norman Rockwell, part Parenthood. A clattering cacophony of little footsteps and rattling toys.

I noticed it last night while making dinner. The girls just ran after one another, tumbling from a hide out under the dining room table to the fort beneath the kitchen table. Maya had attached bibs around both their necks, and they were pretending to dine in their fort (don't worry, I had just swept the floor, so stale cheerios were not part of their "dining").


I made an entire (albeit simple) meal without picking Elle up even once! Let's hope this means that my freakishly bulging left bicep will subside soon.


Even now, as I post this, the girls are running around in the play room, happy and occupied. I think 2009 will be a fantastic year to parent these sisters... even if the love is a bit too much for Elle sometimes :)

Temporary Ban

My daughter is only three and a half, but already my rule as information czar is weakening.

I'll admit it freely. I've wielded my power with a heavy hand, and I intend to keep doing so. In most cases, you all would support me as I select only television shows without violence or commercials, limit screen time, promote strong moral character... It all expected parental dictatorship.

But did you know that I am also a book banner. That's right. I ban books. Eek!

It was a completely unanticipated act of violence against the written word. I was once an eager high school student that purposefully sought out formerly banned books to read recreationally, inspired by my love of Uncle Tom's Cabin.

Then one day, amid several other, lovely books, was a terrible tale of some ballerina princess and her battle with her best friend over who got to be the star of the show. It was wretched, but of course, Maya asked for it again and again.

At first, I hid it in the sofa. It was so easy. Out of sight out of mind. Then, months later, when I found it while cleaning up, I tucked it out with the recycling. I did have a little guilt about throwing away a book, but once that first one was out of the way, it was so much easier. I must have pitched 6, maybe even 10 books by now, all because the story was unacceptable.

Ultimately, my iron fisted rule has been diminished by my other compulsion: excessive picture taking. For the past two months, every time Maya walks by a particular picture of her and Grandpa reading, she throws a fit. "Where is my Bully book?" She asks, demanding that we look for it.


I know where it went. Shoot. It was horrible. One of the few Mercer Mayer books I can't stand. It actually instructs Critter and Little Sister to HIT the bully, which doesn't jive with my position on violence at all!

Today, Just a Bully arrived in the mail. Maya's poor dad caved in to her nagging while I was off on vacation. I'm not sure that it's in me to commit the same crime a second time, adding the offending picture to the recycling in order to keep her mind off it.... but maybe....

There & Back Again

Essentially, I've taken three weeks off from blogging, though not from writing. Both my family blog, Growing, and this one were totally neglected.

For once, I actually had a vacation from my vacation, as so many people long for during the holidays. All of that deeply layered, often quietly judgmental, occasionally openly hostile holiday visiting was exhausting. Thankfully, my most beloved friend turned 30 just a week after New Year's. We celebrated with a four day excursion in Grand Marais, MN.

Four days may not sound like much, but until then, I hadn't been away from 15-month-old Elliot for more than a couple of hours, and as a result, 3 and a half year old Maya has also been Velcro-ed to me for some time. We all managed the separation beautifully, and I joyfully discovered that beneath the finger paint and the ketchup stains, I still am an adult, capable of long, indulgent conversations and lots of fun that doesn't include Dora or the Disney Princesses.

Yea for me!

Even with the three week blogging hiatus, I managed to write daily, though rarely on a computer. Once I scrawled on a page from my daughter's coloring book, when I couldn't find my journal in the car. I left the Nano book alone and wrote whatever came to mind.

I now feel crammed full of stories. Stories family members told one another at holiday celebrations. Fantasies (some not so nice) I had about family members over the holidays (hee hee). Stories that sort of coagulated from random thought slush during long drives.

I'm had a couple of plot breakthroughs for Prairie Apocalypse, so I'm absolutely motivated to get started on the rewrite. I simply have to draft a new outline so I can keep it all in my head.

Also, I just finished re-watching the Lord of the Rings trilogy, calling to mind the books that I've read several times. As I strive to learn the art of story telling, that is the perfect learning tool!

Now, rejuvenated from a mini-holiday, refueled by lots of random writing, I'm definitely in the mood to tell a story.

Off I go.

Gone & Back Again

It's so unlike me to neglect the blog for this long! But I'm back, once again striving for at least three posts per week.

My title, Gone & Back Again, does not just describe my blogging habits of late. I was, in fact, gone and back again. Some of you silent judgers who are shocked and amazed at how little I have been away from my girls in the past two years may now be staring open mouthed at the screen.

But yes, I was gone for a bit. Four days. Three nights. Not the month-long holiday I probably need to regain my sanity, but long enough to thoroughly celebrate a friend's 30th birthday.

As you might expect, it was a much needed, long awaited, and deeply appreciated respite from both the daily grind and the holiday chaos. As planned, the girls stayed home with their daddy and his back up support: Nana. They had at least as much fun as I did, from what I've heard.

I was surprisingly unworried about their well-being, which was lucky since my Grand Marais cell phone reception was sketchy.

For those who haven't been, Grand Marais is a wonderful weekend getaway destination, though January trips are solely for the hardiest of northerners. It was bitter cold, but we stayed warm enough to go snow shoeing one day. Spa treatments inside our lovey East Bay suite were definitely enhanced by the sweeping blue horizon along Lake Superior, which shimmered just outside our balcony windows.

Also if you get a chance, Chez Jude's 5 course tasting menu is worth a trip north all by itself. I actually teared up by the time we got to the dessert, though I'm still unsure if my tears were for the spectacular food or the sheer joy of lingering three hours over a meal uninterrupted by the never ending chant "mom, mom, mom."

So today, we're settling back into things, happy to be together, recentered, and ready for cold, quiet winter days ahead.

Below: Keeping up New Year's Resolutions, Puppet Shows, Finger Painting (check out Elliot in the background), and a Brave Venture Outside.